Suffering in Silence
by WinchesterWorshiper
Summary: When Alex is put on another mission and broken physically and mentally, how will his twin brother Shane and the K-Unit react? Potential second chapter?
1. Chapter 1

Alex was sitting in his room listening to his music trying to get his mind off of what happened. The song changed to Here without you and suddenly Alex couldn't breathe. The walls were coming closer and he felt claustrophobic. Their current guardian, Fox, was out with the k-unit and his twin brother, Shane, grocery shopping. It was weird sort of but fox couldn't go shopping without snake to tell him what they need to get nutritionally, eagle insisted he go because "they wouldn't get the right foods for eagles to eat", wolf said that he needed to supervise the whole situation being the unit leader and all, and Shane just wanted to get out of the house for a while.

Since Jack died a year and a half ago, Alex and Shane have been living with the K-Unit. Alex had tried to live with the pleasures for a while but both parties just couldn't handle the living conditions. Once Alex and Shane has been reunited and settled in with the k- unit, Alex had been called for another mission. Shane was extremely upset with MI6, they had promised no more missions for Alex, but apparently the world needed him one last time. So when Alex came home from that mission, bruised and broken mentally and physically Shane didn't know what to think.

_The day, or rather night, Alex came home was quiet the shock. Shane had gone to bed along with the k-unit and was sleeping quite soundly. Shane didn't know what woke him first but when he turned over in his sleep he nearly crushed the second person in his bed. Said person woke with a start and rolled over onto the floor making a sound thump. The person scrambled to a corner and threw his hands around his head. Shane couldn't see anything because of how dark it was so he moved to the light switch and turned on the light. Alex. He was finally home but something was wrong. His usually strong, good natured brother was trembling in a corner cowering from him. As if…as if Shane was going to hurt him. No this was not good, not good at all. _

"_Alex?" Shane asked, while taking a step towards him, however Alex was still unaware of his surroundings and just tried to move impossibly further into the corner. _

"_Shhhh Alex it's just me I promise your safe, you're no longer there ok?" Shane took another step towards his brother. His hands were up in a non-threatening way. Alex had moved his hands away from his head slowly and looked at his brother, however, it was unfortunate that at this exact moment K-unit slammed the door open and rushed in with guns out all pointing to Alex in the corner. Alex's eyes became wide and he scrambled to the furthest corner away from the k-unit, gasping really fast, hyperventilating._

"_Guys its ok, its Alex, put the damn guns away" Shane said in an authoritative yet soothing voice so not to scare Alex again._

"_Alex? Its ok the pack"-it was a nickname Shane had given them from his first encounter with the unit-"is just a big group of goofs. They aren't going to hurt you I promise ok? Alex just looks at me, Alex please" Shane said however Alex just shook his head. Shane took this as a queue that he was finally getting through to Alex a little bit, so he crouched down onto his knees and sat in front of his brother._

"_Alex?" Shane asked once again. Alex lifted his head slightly saw who was sitting in front of him and lunged forward into the arms of his brother, clutching the sides of shane's shirt. Shane instinctively wrapped his arms around him to comfort him. Shane began to feel his shirt getting wet and knew that Alex was crying. And he started to comfort his brother. After a while Shane was able to persuade Alex into Shane's bed and go to sleep. While Shane was lying next to his brother who was curled up next to him Shane remembers that the pack had come in, hmm they must have left at some point in time, but it really didn't matter anymore. Alex hadn't said one word to him, not one. A few more days went by and Alex still hadn't talked to him, or anyone for that matter so the pack and Shane decided that they needed to take him to a psychologist to figure out what was wrong. _

_PTSD the doctors called it, it was the explanation as to why Alex wouldn't talk. Alex wouldn't look anyone in the eyes and didn't like to be touched, well, with the exception of his brother. Alex wouldn't be living still if Shane wasn't there to help him through whatever he was going through._

His big brother duty is what he called it. Shane was older by about two hours. Shane was a natural birth and had been a healthy 7lb 2once bouncing baby boy, however Alex got stuck in the birthing canal and had to go into emergency sea section. Alex came out smaller then Shane, 5lb 3onces with the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck, and fluid in the lungs. In the end Alex came away healthy just smaller. To this day Alex is still smaller than his brother. Alex and Shane are identical twins. The only way that they are able to tell apart from each other is they're size. The two had been inseparable since their birth. Crying whenever apart and complete best friends.

.Alex had nightmares almost constantly that woke up the entire house. But the only one who Alex would allow to comfort him was his brother. That was pretty much the only time that Alex made noise. The brothers slept side by side on the same bed. When they went to sleep Shane would lay on his back and Alex would lay his head on Shane's chest. Shane would run his fingers through his hair soothing alex to sleep. Alex was always touching some part of Shane to insure that he was still there. Wherever Shane went Alex went as well, except for today.

Alex put on his running shoes and kept his iPod on. And Alex ran.

Thump thump thump thump thump thump

Alex didn't know how long he ran must have been a while because the next thing he knew he was standing in front of an old restaurant. One that Alex happened to know was at least 20 miles away from the house he shared with k-unit. This restaurant was familiar though….

_Oh…OH this is the place that jack had taken them to when it was their birthday and Ian was out on "business" Alex was heartbroken, while Shane was just fine with it. Ian had promised to take them out for lunch then go to see the old car show that was in town. _

_Alex had been going through a phase of obsessing over cars. So when Ian presented him with tickets to go see the car show Alex had been so incredibly excited he hadn't stopped talking about it while shane couldn't have dreaded more shane hated looking at old cars, what was the point? But if Alex wanted to do it then Shane would suffer through it. Next year was going to be Shane's turn to choose where they would spend their birthday. But then Ian said that he wasn't going to make it. Jack seeing Alex on such a horrible mood on his birthday decided to take them out. Jack took them to this particular restaurant insisting that they had the best donuts ever…Jack had never before been to this place and neither of the boys new this, placing full faith on their housekeeper they followed her in. The food was cold, the pastries rack hard, and the service sucked, but Alex and Shane had had the best birthday that day simply because jack had tried to make it special. The entire time they had laughed about nothing and talked about everything. _

Alex had to get out of this place right this second it was breaking his heart all over again. So looking forward Alex started to run again.

Alex didn't know when he started to cry, nor did he know where he was. He can't do this alone anymore. His whole suffer in silence wasn't working the way he wanted it too. Almost automatically his hand reached for his phone and dialed his brother.

The pack was checking out of the grocery store when Shane's phone started to ring. He pulled out his phone from his pocket and checked the caller ID. It was Alex, wait it was Alex…he didn't talk so Alex usually just texted fox whenever he needed something. Maybe Alex just butt dialed him or something.

He pressed the button "Alex?" Fox asked confused. "Alex?"

"Shane…" the whispered reply came through and instantly fox was concerned, for Alex to be talking something must have happened.

"Alex what's the matter buddy?" Shane said instantly worrying the team behind him. Shane looked at for who turned around and looked pointedly to wolf that had the smart phone that held the tracker of Alex so that when things like this happened they could find out where Alex was.

"Shane…" Alex said again, almost on replay.

"He is about 40 miles away in what looks like the middle of nowhere." Wolf told fox.

"Hang on buddy we are on our way ok just stay where you are ok?" Shane said into the phone.

"Shane…" came the reply. That's when he heard the sniffle that told fox that he was crying.

After Shane ended the call, they quickly paid for the groceries loaded the car and sped off to find Alex.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Rolling hills of green grass going as far as the eye could see and the mind could possibly imagine. Said hills were split in half a very small, two lane road, that desperately needed service. Fifty years ago, the government decided that they needed a road to connect the two cities so they did. But after a while they forgot about this road. The element had not been to kind to this lonely road. Weathered away by rain and the occasional car the drove by once in a great moon. It was a pathetic little road but to Alex it was comforting. Offering a place to run out his frustrations and fears and sadness. Although Shane told him to stay where he was he just couldn't stay still. So Alex just started running the opposite direction that they were coming from. The car was faster than him so it would catch up to him eventually.

"Well this is what the tracker said that he was right here." Wolf said getting aggravated. There were $150 dollars of groceries in the car allot of meats that were spoiling by the minute. They had driven 45 minutes and there still was no sign of Alex. Where the hell was this boy?

"Why don't you just try calling him Shane?" eagle said.

So Shane pulled out his phone and called his brother. Shane didn't expect an answer from his brother so when Alex picked up the phone it was a surprise.

"Alex man I thought I told you to stay where you were" no answer just heavy breathing that told Shane Alex was running. "Yah I know ADHD sucks doesn't it bro; well we've got your ever changing location we are on our way if you're not in that place then just keep heading in that general direction ok? I'll take that as a yes be there in a bit" Shane ended the call.

Shane had to laugh at the fact that Alex couldn't stay still for a period of time. Always moving, and this had been this way since Alex was little. Drove Ian and jack absolutely insane. It finally got to the point that jack had to convince Ian to take the hyperactive twelve years old to the doctors to figure out why he just couldn't stay still. Why did it take so long for Ian to take him? It was because Ian had been gone so often that he hadn't ever seen the boy at his worst. Shane was the only one that Alex would kind of slow down around. But when Ian took Alex to a play to watch Shane be a tree, Ian finally understood why jack insisted that they get back row end seats and refused to sit next to him. The entire play Alex was up, or down, playing with his hands, taking off his shoe, asking to switch seats with Ian, walking around the back of the room, and talking almost the entire time. The only time Alex sat somewhat quietly was when Shane wobbled up to the microphone and spoke his single line in the two hour production. But then Alex was back up moving restlessly throughout the rest of the play. Ian was thoroughly exhausted by the end of the theatre production.

ADHD, of course it was that. They had tried medication for a while but Alex hated it, said it made him feel weird and Shane backed his brother up 100% on this. Alex just wasn't the same when on the medication. He became quiet and withdrawn from even his brother. After about three weeks of Alex not being Alex, Shane forced him to stop taking the pills and after a few days Alex was back to his regular self, and Shane made sure to be near him most of the time to keep him settled. There were other tricks that Shane used to keep Alex from being too hyperactive, such as giving him gum for his tongue to play with, not giving him sugar, making him go on a run in the morning and right before they went to bed, and making sure all of Alex's teachers knew that it was ok for Alex to have a small stress ball to mess around with. In a way Shane was not only his older brother, but also his "motherly figure". It was cute. Sure they were still brothers first and foremost, fought like hell too, but at the end of the day Alex and Shane were as close as two brothers could get without it being considered something else.

When they finally found Alex again he was pacing in a field aggressively with his hands gripping his hair like he was trying to rip it out.

He was breathing hard but not hyperventilating.

"Guys just stay in the car I'm going to try and talk to him ok?" Shane said as he got out of the car.

"Hey Alex what's goin on bro?" Shane asked Alex. Shane was watching Alex really carefully. Watching the way the hands were fluttering when he released his hair how they went right back up to his hair. Alex turned to his brother and opened his mouth, and it really looked like he was going talk for a minute, but closed his mouthed and exhaled like he was frustrated and went back to pacing.

"Come on Alex, talk to me!" Shane pleaded with his brother. But he was getting nowhere fast with him, so he decided to take a different route. One that got his brother to talk, no matter what. Shane didn't use it before because. He didn't want to push him, but this time it looked like Alex was ready to talk.

"are you scared?" Alex shook his head, "ohhhh I get it…yah Alex this whole suffering in silence thing that you have going on right now is stupid. You know it never gets you anywhere. It's STUPID! Talk to me about it! IM YOUR BROTHER FOR CRYIN OUT LOUD! Do you think that mom or dad would have wanted you to be doing this?" it was at the mention of mom and dad that Alex went still. "Mom and dad? This is what this is about. That's stupid Alex. We weren't even a year yet when they died. You've basically never met them!" and that was how you did it with Alex, piss him off until he snaps, Alex attacks, cry's a little then confesses his heart out to whoever is there to listen to him.

"DON'T SAY THAT AHHHHHH" Alex yelled at Shane. And with that Alex initiated his attack on his brother. A punch was thrown from one boy, retaliation from the other. The pack from the car saw the fight break out and thought it would be quite humorous in any other situation however Alex looked like he was going to kill Shane and Shane was starting to look desperate. Alex and Shane had both had the same training from Ian, and would spar on each other all the time. The pack scrambled out of the car to get to the boys. Fox ran around to Shane and Wolf ran around to where Alex was fighting. Wolf wrapped his arms around Alex. But this seemed to scare him more and he started to struggle even more. Snake and Eagle both went to help wolf out. Alex was thrown to the ground and Wolf lay on top of him holding each of Alex's arms to his sides. Snake and Eagle both went to the legs holding them firmly in place. Alex was still trying to wiggle out of their grasps.

Meanwhile fox was with Shane seeing if he was alright. There was no horrible damage done but he did have a split lip that wasn't bleeding anymore.

"Fox I'm fine let me go to him please" Shane was watching the whole situation with terror. He was the one who evoked him in the first place.

Shane went to Alex and lay on his stomach to talk to Alex.

"Hey Alex look at me. Calm down. Ok take deep breaths. They aren't trying to hurt you I promise ok?" Shane tried to sooth him.

"They killed them they killed them they killed them" and with that whispered phrase Alex broke down into tears. The fighting mass beneath the pack became limp and started shaking with sobs. The pack released their hold on Alex but Alex stayed where he was gasping and sobbing.

"Hey, hey it's ok buddy" Shane said moving Alex to where he was in Shane's lap. "Listen to my voice; match my breathing….do you feel me breathing?" Alex nodded his head, "good that's real good now try and match it calm your breaths" After just a few minutes Alex was being calm-or well calmer than he was earlier. "Better?" another nod "ok then do you want to tell me who killed who?" Alex was silent for a moment and Shane thought that Alex wasn't going to say anything else. But then Alex turned his head into Shane's shirt and gave a muffled response.

"Sorry bud but you're going to have to speak up a little bit." Shane said with a soft smile looking down at Alex. The love in his eyes for his brother was so great that the men standing in the background decided to go back to the car to give the boys a moment.

"Mom and dad" Shane was kind of confused. Their parents were killed when they were babies. Why was Alex upset about it now?

"Yah but Alex you already knew that they were dead" Shane said.

"No they weren't" Alex said not looking at Shane. The silence pushed Alex to continue, "they weren't dead they were just in hiding. They couldn't come for us because they would be compromised before they could reach us." Shane was shocked to learn that his parents were still alive, but wait…Alex said that they killed them…

"So let me get this straight…we thought that mom and dad were dead but it turns out they weren't but now they are again?" Shane asked still not understanding why this would make a difference for Alex it would be just the same for Alex wouldn't it? So he spoke his confusion to Alex.

"You don't understand" Alex said

"Your right bud I don't you've got to tell me what happened so that I can help you through this ok?"

"Right now?"

"Yes right now"

"do I have to?"

"hey you called me remember? I was having a good time at the grocery store when my brother calls me up and I start freaking the hell out trying to understand what is going on with him…please man you've got to talk to me this is killing you." Shane desperately needed to know what was going on with his twin. Not knowing was killing him.

"ok…ok ill tell you…but at home can we go home now…please" Alex pleaded with his brother

The tone that Alex used broke Shane's heart he sounded all of five again. Whatever had happened broke Alex, and it was going to be a long road back for recovery.

"yah man, we can go home lets go home"

**Note from the Author**

**This was originally a one shot but then I felt that things had not been resolved properly so here is the next chapter, I definitely have another one going on. Might not happen for a while, schools ending soon so I'm a little stressed out. But as soon as summer hits I should be getting this story out and going. I am not really sure what I have planned for this so suggestions are welcome. **


	3. Chapter 3

Alex and Shane loved their bedroom. Yah their bedroom in Chelsea had been nice and big and spacious but it was kind of boring the walls were plain white and they had matching beds and it had posters making the bedroom feel like it was theirs but Ian would never allow them to change it up a little bit.

Before wolf enlisted in the army and later SAS, he bought a nice big house with his money, paid it in full, which he had received from his grandfather from inheritance. It was amazing the house it sat on three acres of land that had enough room to own the two horses that he had always dreamed about and inside the house lay five bedrooms three bathrooms and the attack was a separate room in itself taking up the entire third story it had air conditioning and it was nice and big with slanting walls that were painted white.

In this attic wolf had planned to make it his own personal studio for whatever he desired however, when he went into the army he didn't get to finish it. Being the team leader wolf had told the unit that they could move in with him. And all three of them jumped on the opportunity.

Eagle had no family to go back to he was orphaned by his parents dying in an accident when he was twelve years old, snake didn't have a house to go back to seeing as his girlfriend of three years cheated on him while at SAS and fox claimed that he just didn't see the point in having to pay rent when he could just stay at wolfs for free even though they all knew that it was that he needed to be closer to his unit. Fox was called to missions all the time however so his bedroom was empty most of the time, but it was good to know that he had somewhere to go after each of his missions.

When wolf was told that he would be taking care of two teenaged boys for an undetermined amount of time, wolf was glad that he still had one last room available to the boys, the attic. Although the room was empty the walls were white and he didn't even have a bed in there for them the boys where excited when they saw the humongous sized room. The happiness extended tenfold when wolf basically handed over his credit card and said goes. And boy did they go. The bought paint, wood, dressers, desks, beds that hung from the ceiling, rugs, posters, weird chairs, eggs chairs and a few other items.

They painted the walls a deep blue color with a red stripe going around the room the boys had constructed beds that hung from the ceiling with thick ropes that supported a wood frame, the beds held two different bedspreads, because although Alex and Shane are twins they don't always have the same interests, but the two different colors worked well together in the room.

On the floor lay a red rug that had weird triangles on it. On the wall furthest from the door was a rock wall, they were surprised when wolf passed off the room design with the rock wall, because behind the rock wall they had planned a second "secret room" that the boys could go to whenever they wanted peace and quiet from the other boy. This second room was painted every color under the sun; they even at one point took a paint ball gun the walls had painted that way. They had giant bean bag chairs in this room that they were able to relax on.

It was on these bean bag chairs that Alex told Shane his harrowing story of what happened while he was on his mission.

"Shane when I start talking I can't have you interrupting me, I have to get it all out at once or I won't finish" Alex started out in a very quiet voice, he still hadn't gotten used to talking after **six months **of silence.

"Ok course I won't talk I promise" Shane replied with complete sincerity in his voice. He wanted his brother talking to him again, joking with him, and completing sentences again with him. Alex was still his brother through and through but Alex just wasn't the same without his voice. Having Alex talk about his problem with Shane would be the first steps that Alex needs to take to get back to his regular old self and it was finally happening.

Alex nodded his head; he was silent for a moment while he collected his thoughts about the whole thing. Shane was allowed to listen to his missions and his stories because Alex flat out told MI6 that he would be talking to his brother, MI6 saw no other way so they had Shane sign the Official Secrets Acts form.

"It was supposed to be a simple surveillance mission, why did I listen to them? They told me this the last time and look how screwed up everything got last time. I accepted because they threatened to split us up again…"

Shane felt a pang of anger run through his body, they frigging blackmailed Alex into another mission. They never asked Shane to go on missions because Shane had asthma and couldn't do allot of the things that Alex could. It hardly bothered him now but MI6 had very strict rules as to who was fit enough to go save the world. If it was up to Shane he would have gladly taken the place of his brother if not been right there with him for every single one.

"I was collecting information on Ellen and Jon Rigger, they were suspected of being in the group summertime. Summertime was responsible for bombings in France, and other small crimes. But they were planning on moving up to worldwide take over, nothing big but MI6 needed more information on the group but they had no idea who could even be part of it and when they finally got a couple of suspects they sent me in on it. The Rigger's looked so familiar but I couldn't place them at all.

"I was maybe a week into the mission and somebody came up behind me and grabbed me there were too many of them for me to take on by myself they pushed a rag up to my face and I was knocked unconscious. When I woke up next I was in a dark cell, my head was in the lap of Ellen Rigger and Jon Rigger was sitting right next to his wife. Elle was moving her fingers through my hair and it felt good until I remembered why I was watching them I scrambled out of her lap into the other corner and asked who they were and why they were involved in summertime.

"They told me they went it was actually Jon's brother that had been involved with summertime, and when his brother died they wanted to recruit Jon into the program they refused and that was why the two of them had been captured I was saved from answering why I was captured because the three of us were dragged into a different room and tied down to chairs.

"then the summertime founder came in and gave us the standard story of how he was going to take over the world blah blah blah really the only thing that I got out of the whole story was that his name was Ineabath wanahakaluggy…yah I'm not even joking. The amount of cracks I got in before they came at me was quiet remarkable. But one thing he said was 'don't want to keep this family reunion anymore' I was confused when they said that and asked what he was talking about and he was surprised.

"He said he was surprised that they hadn't told me yet and when I looked at the Rigger's they wouldn't make eye contact with me. So Ineabath said that he just love spoiling surprises so he would tell me instead.

"Shane, Ellen and Jon Rigger were our parents….they were alive this entire time and they didn't tell us…

"After he told me that they were our parents he sent us back to the cell and he left us there for a while and I got to talk to them. Ask them questions and such it felt like a week but really I think it was only four days…

"then we were dragged back into the torture room and he started beating up on mom and when the entire time I hear dad screaming for him to let her go… let her go that's all I ever hear anymore is let her go. When they were done with mom they moved onto dad and beat him until he couldn't talk I tried to plead with them I promise I did I told them to take me hurt me but they wouldn't listen and now mom and dad are really dead because of me

"I watched them die let them die right in front of me and there was absolutely nothing that I could do about it. I'm so sorry Shane I couldn't save them I tried I tried I tried…

At this point Alex was sobbing and Shane came up to Alex and hugged him trying to take away the pain that he knew he couldn't from his little brother. Why the hell did this kind of stuff happen to Alex? But at least Shane understood now…why Alex remained silent for such a long period of time. Shane wouldn't talk much either if he had to watch his parents that he recently found out were still alive die in front of him meanwhile having his tormenter in his head telling him that it was his fault that they were dying. It just wasn't right. It wasn't right.

"Shhhh Alex its ok, I'm here I'm here…." After a while Alex started to calm down and was now lying silently against the chest of his brother. "Alex listen to me…are you listening?" when Shane felt his brother nod his head Shane smiled slightly. "This was in no way shape or form your fault ok?"

"But Shane you weren't there"

"Your right I wasn't and I would have taken your place in a heartbeat to save you from this pain that you are going through."

"It's my fault that you didn't get to meet them I should have tried harder"

"Did you touch mom that physically hurt her, Alex?"

"No but-"

"What about dad?"

"No but-"

"No buts Alex… you did. Not. Kill. Our. Parents. Ineabath did ok…" Shane waited a few seconds and processed what he had just said. And chuckled. "really?" Alex turned around and looked at his brother confusedly. "His name was really Ineabath?"

"Yep Ineabath wanahakaluggy"

"Well did he?"

"Did he what?"

"Come on Alex did he need a bath?"

That got a smile and a chuckle out of Alex, "yah he did, I almost couldn't breathe when he was around me. He stunk so much! And his voice was all nasally like one good throat clearing and he would sound somewhat normal. But his face looked like an arse."

Shane laughed hard at this.

"But that's not the best part his face literally looked like an ass. Like no joke he had a scar going straight down the middle of his face that looked like a butt crack."

Alex and Shane Rider

From down stairs the sound of laughter penetrated the room that held the four pack members, who were playing poker in a thought filled silence. The sound was from not one boy, which had been typical for the past while, but from two and that made the pack smile. It had been a long time since they had heard this noise. Hope was in the air for the recovery of Alex. It would be a long process and Alex was in no ways fixed as of yet but it would happen eventually with the help of his twin brother Shane and the big group of goofs they had come to know as the pack.

**I'm sorry that this so long to get out. Got it completely written then when to camp came back and someone had deleted it…GRRRR. I was also having troubles conveying the right emotions while Alex was talking about what happened. I know it took a while but I finally got it done. I don't know if this is the end of this story I'm still debating it. PM me if you have any ideas as to where I could take this. **


End file.
